Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Miscellaneous...

i'm sorry if it seemed like i went into hiding over the weekend. since i don't have that much time with B, i've been trying to really devote what little i do have entirely to him. this last week was obviously really difficult and it was a strong reminder of just how far away he is. 6 weeks down, 46 more to go. is it just me or is the calendar slowing down?

even though i come home to an empty house (with the exception of two over-eating fur-balls), i have never felt more loved and supported. words can't express how much everyone's supportive comments have meant to me. i never could have imagined that i would find such incredible support and encouragement from random people, who are not obligated to care about me, let alone stand by me through such a difficult journey. i am so unbelievably grateful to each and every one of you who reads and comments on my blog. from the bottom of my heart, thank you!

on top of all of the support online, i have been so blessed to know such wonderful women in my everyday life, who go so far out of their way to let me know they care and are there for me. i have gotten so many calls and texts...and even a few gifts. :) i feel so spoiled and loved! i've never felt so sure that i have been brought to a certain place with certain people in my path for a reason. again...thank you!

so, i go in again for blood work in the morning. they just want to check to make sure the hcg level is less than 5 now. i haven't asked them how long we have to wait before we can do our final IUI, but i should have a chance to talk to the nurse when she calls me with the results.

i'm feeling really anxious to get going again. it feels like i have all this wasted time ahead of me. if we aren't doing a treatment, odds are that we won't get knocked up "accidentally" during this extra fertile time. it's kind of hard to time it when you have no idea when you're going to ovulate and no husband around to take care of business. it would take an actual miracle, not exactly immaculate conception, but not far from it, either!

i did my second session of acupuncture this evening. mrs. J thinks that i just need to get my body warmed up, so that it will produce more blood on its own. she feels strongly that acupuncture could make my cycles shorter and my periods more normal. i'm still feeling open-minded about everything, so i'm just going with it. unfortunately, my insurance won't cover acupuncture, but with all they do cover, i won't complain about this. i guess i'll just do my other two sessions and then see if i want to continue and, if so, how we'll swing the expense of it all. i did notice, however, that my body temperature has been higher than normal. i usually have to bundle up in a blanket when i watch TV, but that really hasn't been necessary over the past week. B, the ultimate skeptic, even noticed it!

anyway, although my house is empty, my heart is full. words don't exist to describe how grateful i am to each and every one of you. i feel surrounded by kindred spirits.

8 comments:

Josey said...

I'm glad you're feeling so loved and supported. :)

Did I ever send you those answers to your questions from forever ago? I just finally got my computer back as well for pics. Let me know!

Baby Hopes said...

Your positivity is amazing and encouraging. You truly are a woman of strength - one to be admired!!!

Rosachka said...

Carlia, this is a beautiful post.

It is nice to know that you can pour your heart out and get love and support from total strangers.

Deborah said...

What can you say, You're easy to love.

"knocked up" So dang funny every time I hear it!!!

Bridget said...

you deserve to feel loved and supported!! It sounds like the acupuncture is doing what it should- that is awesome!

Rebecca said...

I'm glad we can be here to support you because you are an incredible support, too!!

I hate that I have to say this but I hope your HCG number has gotten low enough. I hope you can soon move forward and that the extra fertility kicks in!

marilyn said...

that sound great! You truly appreciate you life and the support you receive! That is what makes life so wonderful. I hope everything goes perfect for you this cycle!

Maria said...

you are so inspiring. it is refreshing to see someone so determined and positive! glad the acupuncture is going well!
lots of love!

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