Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Confessions of an Infertile Mother-to-Be

i'm breaking a rule here by talking about the surrogacy, but i kind of need to get this out of my system before it becomes word vomit that lands on whichever ears happen to be closest.

i'm going to be a mom, but i'm technically still infertile. where does that put me?

clearly, i'm feeling a little displaced these days. i'm not really sure where i fit in, whether it's in the mommy club, the preggo club, or the infertile club. well, i know i can rule out the mommy club for a couple more months, but which of the other two do i belong in? neither. it's sad, but true. i just don't quite fit into either, because i'm not pregnant, but i'm having a baby. it's a grey area that is very confusing.

it's so completely awkward to tell people that we're having a baby then have to explain that i'm not the one who's pregnant. i dread the look people give me when they hear that part, that confused, yet politely pleasant look that says "i think i'm supposed to be happy for you, but i need a moment to process this information."

i'm not at all embarrassed that we've had to go an untraditional route to have our baby, but it can be very difficult emotionally. it's hard to go register for baby gear when you're the only mom-to-be there without a baby bump. things like that kind of make me feel like an imposter at times.

the hardest part of all of this is that i don't get to feel the baby move inside me. i've felt it through her tummy several times, but i don't get that constant reminder that he's there, growing and thriving. i don't get to feel those pregnancy symptoms that can be so uncomfortable, yet so reassuring.

most of you would probably tell me that the pregnancy symptoms are overrated, that having him use your bladder as a soccer ball, the constant back pain, not being able to bend over to tie your own shoes, and all of the extra weight is not worth crying about. maybe you're right, but i still wish i was going through it.

this has been a much more difficult experience than i expected. i never stopped to consider just how emotionally taxing it would all be. i keep telling myself that i just need to focus on the positive and on my gratitude. that said, i really am so grateful that we're going to finally become parents and that someone was willing to do this for us. i love this little boy more than words can say, though i haven't even met him yet, and whether or not i carried him doesn't change the fact that i am his mother.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Sharing the Wealth

in honor of ICLW (hi ICLWers!), i'm going to let you in on a secret. intrigued? i thought so.

this is more for the mommies and soon-to-be mommies, but if you aren't too superstitious and don't mind bringing something baby-related into your house, feel free to join in!

so, here it is... i opened up my money mai.ler this week and found a fabulous coupon! you know by now that i'm uber cheap, so when i see "free" on a coupon, i pretty much freak out. this particular coupon doubles up for two online stores: se.ven sli.ngs and ud.der co.vers. a free sling and a free cover!!! (i don't really need the cover, since i won't be able to nurse, but i'm jumping up and down about the sling.)

this is the one i got. i still can't believe it was free! (i did have to pay shipping, though.)

now, here's how you benefit from this...it's a generic coupon code and i'm feeling rather generous at the moment ;) , so i'm going to share the code with anyone that wants it. if you feel so inclined, shoot me an email at storkdropzone at gmail dot com, asking me for it and i'll send you the websites and the codes. just because you're awesome, no strings attached!

*their websites say that they ship to US, canada, and australia, but i'm not sure if the codes are region-specific or not. can't hurt to try, though!

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Change of Plans


i mentioned before that i'm going to make the crib bedding myself. well, that's still the plan. what isn't part of the plan anymore is the crib bumper. after reading this article on cnn, B and i decided that the increase in the risk of SIDS that particular piece of the bedding brings isn't worth the aesthetic.

i have to admit that i'm a little relieved. that was the one part of the bedding that really intimidated me. either way, the bedding is going to be fan-freaking-tastic and beyond adorable! i just know it!

Monday, October 17, 2011

Project: Newsboy Hat

i know i'm not paying as much attention to my blog as i should be. i'm sorry! it's just because my list of projects is so long and i can only tackle it one item at a time.

this week's project is the newsboy hat. i need to make a few of these in various colors and sizes, but they're pretty fast, so they shouldn't take too long.

this is the first one i made (newborn size) and i am totally in love with it!

i wish i could give the pattern away to all of you crocheters out there, but, alas, it is not mine to give. i can, however, tell you where you can buy it. click here!

next project: baby afghan!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Best. Husband. Ever.

i know i always brag about how awesome B is, but, seriously, he is.

a few weeks ago he surprised me with a thank you gift for all that i did with the move (since he wasn't around during most of it). knowing me as well as he does, he got me something that he knew i would appreciate more than flowers or chocolates or anything like that. he reserved a me a spot on a photography field trip with an award winning photographer!

most of you know that i do photography on the side (i'm a graphic designer by day), so this surprise was perfect for me.

it was scheduled for october 1st, so i'm a little late in posting about it, but it was so fun that i really had to post about it regardless. (and because i wanted to make sure B knows just how much i appreciate it - yes, he is just so awesome that he does, in fact, read this blog!)

for those of you familiar with the baltimore area, the field trip was in the mount washington area at an old factory that had been converted into a whole foods and a starbucks. i was hoping for something a little more urban, but the architecture was still pretty cool, plus there was this awesome industrial sculpture made of old rusty gears.

here are my fave pics of the day:

it was such a fun day and a huge boost to my self-confidence to find out that i'm not nearly as clueless when it comes to photography as i thought i was. thank you, B! you really are the best husband ever!

Friday, October 7, 2011

Only the Best for My Baby ;)

i have to admit that i've been kind of obsessing about the whole crib thing. they're all so expensive and there are so many options. it's a little overwhelming.

i started by looking at craigslist. slim pickings, at best, plus they were all wanting practically what they paid for they're cribs when they were new! well, that was a lot of wasted time.

next, i started looking at the baby stores, as well as walmart and target. their prices weren't terrible, even for the 4-in-1 style that i wanted. they even had some really cute ones! so, i called B and told him to go online to look at a few that i had picked out. he really liked them, but, in perfect B fashion, he asked me how consumer reports rated them. huh. i didn't think of that.

B is always researching big purchases before he commits. i really appreciate how thorough he is. since this is such an important purchase, i took his advice and did my homework.

unfortunately, consumer reports didn't rate that many cribs. i think there were only about 19 on there. the one that rated the best gave me a little sticker shock. $600! yeah, no thanks. the next few rated the same and varied in prices, but the one that stuck out to me was called the emily 4-in-1 by davinci for about $280. it rated second highest and the personal reviews i read were all enthusiastically positive. i almost passed on it, though, because the only color consumer reports showed it in was honey oak. YUK!

lucky for me, amazon carries that crib in several finishes. the best part, though, is the price! they carry it for $199, which includes the toddler rail, and is eligible for the free super saver shipping. YAY! we picked the ebony finish (well, B picked it) and applied the $50 gift card to amazon that we've been saving for something special and our grand total for a brand new crib that converts to a toddler bed, a day bed, and a full size bed for only $149!

that's one huge check off my list. (insert enormous grin here.)
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